To His Other Mother

Tomorrow is a very special day.  It is the day we will celebrate my youngest son’s 7^th birthday.  It is also the day we will celebrate the day you gave birth to your only son.  It will be a happy day because that little boy is so excited to be “bigger”.  It will be bittersweet though because we will talk about his birth, of which I know not one single detail; we will reminisce about you and how precious he was to you; he will miss you terribly.

You may not be able to celebrate this milestone with your baby, but you have given him some tremendous gifts that he will carry throughout his entire life, and I am so very thankful for them.  You gave him a solid foundation in his early years.  Despite his tender age, he carries with him precious memories of you.  He remembers you playing with him, laughing with him, and most importantly, loving him. You gave him such a cherished gift – the knowledge deep inside that he was valued and wanted and loved by you. 

I know when he was born, or when he took his first steps or said his first words, you never once could have imagined that in just a few short years he would be growing up on the other side of the world, speaking another language, and adored by a mama with blue eyes.  Adoption is a blessing, but it always comes by way of tragedy and loss.   I am so very saddened by his tremendous loss, but I am so utterly thankful to be part of the recovery and solution.

I just tucked our little boy in for the last time as a six year old.  I was lying there with his little head snuggled up against my chest, and I couldn’t help but be in awe of the blessing I have been given.  Not only do I get to know and love this amazing little boy, but I get to call him my own for the rest of my life.   What a gift!  But even as I call him my own and feel him so willingly share his heart with me, I also realize that a piece of his heart will always and forever be with you.  And that is okay.

You were his first mama and gave him his beginning.  I have the immense privilege of finishing the job you started.  I feel a tremendous responsibility to you to do the job well, to raise him to the very best of my abilities, and to help him realize all the potential God placed in him from the moment he was conceived in your womb. I pray regularly that God use the losses and grief and really hard circumstances he's already faced in his young life to strengthen him to do amazing things in the rest of his life.   I often watch him playing or laughing or learning, and I picture you looking down on us.  I think you would be smiling.  He’s a pretty special little guy.

My son loves you because you were and always will be his mama.  I love you because you gave him life.  You have given this world a precious gift:  my son and yours. You will live on forever in his heart.  And mine.

Happy Birth Day.